It?s Sunday night and you are in front of your computer psyching yourself up to upload your personal profile to the online dating agency you are registered with. You?ve done this kind of thing before but haven?t been happy with the responses. They just don?t seem to ?get? you. What isn?t working about your personal profile? It seems to read okay, you?ve shown it to a few friends and they think it describes you. What are you doing wrong?
Think about your goals
Before you even start writing your profile you should sit yourself down and think hard about what you want and who you really are. How can you write about yourself in a realistic manner if you don?t know yourself? What do you want in life long-term, what do you want right now? What sort of relationship do you see yourself in, and who with? Are you looking for a serious relationship? A casual one? Long-term, and do you want marriage? Or are you looking for companionship? And most importantly-what sort of person are YOU?
When you meet someone in person or speak with them on the telephone it is easy to pick up clues as to what that person is like, since you get an instant connection. But online all you have to work with is your profile, so every word you choose has to count.
Ten Top Tips to Writing the Perfect Profile
- Before you start, always read the site guidelines, and any hints and tips they may supply. This information will steer you in the right direction.
- Remember the profile is about YOU. So give people a glimpse into your personality. And be honest! That doesn?t mean listing negative things about yourself but don?t claim to be an extrovert if you?re not. The golden rule is to talk about who you are, not how you look and what you do.
- Try to imagine that you are meeting someone new for the first time in a casual setting such as a coffee shop, a work function, or a friend?s party. Think about the kind of things you would tell others about yourself. Your dating profile is essentially what you would tell that person.
- Follow a factual but casual approach to writing your personal ad. You want to let the people get to know concrete things about you, but at the same time, your ad should not come across as a boring resume.
- Include some humor and exclamation marks! But not too many!!!!! Make it interesting and fun.
- Keep it short and snappy. A good online dating profile is about 200-250 words long, with 150-200 of those words to describe yourself, and 50-100 words describing the kind of person you are looking for.
- If the site allows you to put a headline, remember these usually appear in search lists, so it needs to be positive and catchy?you want to snag people?s attention.
- Avoid the ordinary such as, ?I like reading, I enjoy working out, I like walking my dog,? etc. Who doesn?t like doing these things?! Rather, be descriptive about things that are important to you. Be positive rather than passive in your descriptions; so rather than writing ?I love family life,? say, ?I have a great family and we have fun socializing together.? It sounds much more appealing.
- Perfection takes time. Don?t expect to get it right at the first attempt. Rather than trying to write a complete paragraph the first time you sit down to write, just start by jotting down phrases and ideas. Then sort them into a coherent order before using these as a basis to write your profile.
- At the end of the day, just be yourself!